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Published in Appalachia Inside Out, University of Tennessee Press, 1996.
The Rabbit Hunt
"I don't like the dark," Le Roy said.
Black clouds hid the stars, wind-blown trees covered porch lights that ordinarily shined like giant orange fireflies stuck to the side of the mountain, and he was standing so far under the hill he couldn't see Grandpa Farley's kitchen light.
Le Roy trembled.
Spotlighting rabbits seemed like a good idea this afternoon, when Le Roy had sat on the front porch, wiping his gun with an oily rag, letting the bright fall sunshine warm his face, while Pa Sat beside him, his big hands shining the small carbide lantern he'd borrowed from One-Eyed Gatty, an old coal miner who lived alone on top of Black Mountain, his only family a dozen redbone hounds.
That was this afternoon.
Now, standing on the edge of a forty acre hayfield, surrounded by woods and animals, with Pa towering over him in the darkness, it didn't seem like such a good idea. Only the .22 caliber rifle he clutched in his hands kept him from running.
"I don't like the dark," Le Roy said again, gripping the gun even tighter and holding it closer to his chest.
The barrel felt cold against his skin.
"It'll be all right," Pa answered. "As soon as I get this lantern going."
Le Roy heard his father shaking the lantern up and down, mixing carbide and water together. When he stopped, he twisted the rusty knob until gas hissed, flipped the wheel on his Zippo and a long, thin flame shot out. He twisted the knob again, narrowing the flame, slipped the lighter back in his pocket and put the miner's cap on his head.
Le Roy stood in his shadow.
"Let's go," Pa said. He picked his gun up off the ground and started out across the field, his boots crushing the hay, his light shining back and forth. Le Roy followed the light as much as he followed Pa, but now they were one in the same and he couldn't tell them apart. Then the light stopped.
"There he is," Pa said, pointing.
Le Roy looked. He could see two red eyes. He flicked the safety off with his right hand, raised the rifle to his shoulder, sighted carefully down the barrel, and pulled the trigger.
CRAAAACKKKK
The rabbit flipped over and lay still.
"You got him!" Pa said, running forward.
Le Roy followed close behind, barely missing the flying feet rising in front of him. His heart pounded and his breath came in short gasps. He couldn't remember being so excited. When they got to the rabbit, Pa stopped and looked down. The carbide lamp formed a puddle of light at his feet. Le Roy looked around him. The rabbit was lying on its side.
Right between his eyes was a small, round hole. Blood trickled out of the hole and ran down his nose.
"Damn fine shot, Le Roy," Pa said, patting him on the shoulder.
Le Roy smiled when he looked down at the rabbit, and a small thrill of satisfaction ran up his back. He could still hear the crack of the gun and could see the rabbit flipping backwards. When he flexed his hands the muscles were stronger, and the place on his shoulder where the gun went was bard. For the first time in his Life he felt close to Pa.
Pa picked up the rabbit, tied a piece of twine around his hind legs, and handed him to Le Roy.
"You killed him," he said. "You carry him."
Le Roy reached out and took the dead rabbit, still soft and warm. He tied the twine around his waist and followed Pa across the field. Each time his foot hit the ground, he could feel the rabbit bounce against his leg. After two more sudden stops, and two more shots, Le Roy was weighed down by three dead rabbits, each with a nice, neat, round hole between the eyes. They couldn't have been placed any better if he'd shot them from a foot away. Le Roy felt taller, heavier and stronger. He was less afraid of the dark, and the gun in his hands was like a magic wand, wherever he pointed it, a rabbit fell--dead. He was a crack shot, and it made him feel good.
"There he is, deadeye," Pa said, pointing once again at two red eyes.
Le Roy aimed, but this time his left hand dropped, and before he could raise it, he pulled the trigger. The shot went low, and instead of the rabbit flipping over backwards, dead, he sprawled out on the ground in front of them, turning first one way and then the other, squealing in pain.
"Come on, Le Roy," Pa said, running forward.
Le Roy hung back, his skin sweaty and clammy beneath his clothes. The light hurt his eyes, but that wasn't what held him back.
"Come on," he heard Pa yell again, a hint of anger in his voice. "Get up here and kill this rabbit!"
His legs moved forward, drawn toward the rabbit by the sound of Pa's voice. When he got there he looked down.
The rabbit was trying to run, but he couldn't. The bullet had broken his back, and he was pinned to the ground in a circle of light. All he could do was push himself around and around, while blood poured from his mouth and nose and the hole in his chest. His eyes were swelled with fear, like he couldn't understand how his life had left, or where it had gone. He was caught in the confusion of dying. Le Roy raised the gun to end his confusion, but Pa reached out and pushed it down.
"No sense wasting a shell," he said. "Just stomp his head."
Le Roy looked up at Pa, his eyes big as white silver dollars. All the power he'd felt quickly drained away.
"No." Le Roy said. "Let me shoot him."
He tried to raise the gun, but Pa pushed it down again.
"Stomp his head," Pa said, an angry edge clearly in his voice, "I won't tell you again"
He raised his band above his head and held it there, ready to hit Le Roy if be didn't do as he was told. Le Roy put his foot on the rabbit's head. The rabbit tried to move, but Le Roy pressed harder and harder, driving it deeper into the dirt, pressing more and more until he felt the bones crack.
SNAP
The rabbit lay still.
His confusion was ended.
So was Le Roy's. He stepped back, threw his gun on the ground, ripped the dead rabbits off his waist, and slung them as hard as he could. They didn't go far, because they seemed to weigh a thousand pounds. He turned and ran away.
"Come back!" he heard Pa yell, his voice no longer angry. "What's wrong? Everyone kills rabbits that way!"
"Not me," Le Roy yelled back.
He could see the light. He ran toward it, leaving the darkness behind.
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